What Did You Do Today? (roommate dialog)
Me: What did you do today?
Roommate: It’s a secret.
Me: Poop, well if i guess right will you tell me?
Me: (knowing it was a secret, i went for personal lol. All questions were responded with “Nope” by the way) sex shop? Donating plasma or bodily fluids of any kind in exchanges for money? The pound? Was it an adventure? Travel? Museum?
Roommate: I’m done playing this game, so i’m not gonna answer you anymore.
Me: fine i will make up funny stories in my head about what you did today…..
Story #1: She went to the library and checked out some Rosetta Stone Learn Spanish dvds. Learned the entire spanish language in 3 hours, came home and had a life changing conversation with our Spanish speaking landlords.
Story #2: Went to our local elementary school and snuck into the 5th grader’s classroom at recess and stoll all of their lunches. She squished everything that wasn’t vegan and devowered everything that was vegan.
Story #3: Walked into Vegan House and challenged Lady Kambucha to an MC battle. They battled with authentic gold chains and diamond grills. Lil Jon was passing through and made a guest appearance. They recorded a track in his portable studio, right on the spot; their song is titled “Sippin’ on dat booch, bitch call me vegan”. It’s up on iTunes now; look for the chopped and screwed version and remix featuring T-pain coming soon.
Story #4: Went to the fountain downtown and stole all the change until she was arrested by the cops. Her excuse ” I was making change for a C note”.
Story #5: Joined The Millionaires as there fourth member to be the token white girl. Her stage name: Affermative Action.
If any of these stories were true they would be extremely funny, but sadly they are not. I am pretty sure she said what she did today was a “secret” just to be a beezy.